Once a lifeguard always a lifeguard

When I was a freshman in highschool, I went and got my lifeguarding certification. When I went to college I re-upped and got it renewed. During the summers I would go and work as a Lifeguard for the City of Norfolk wherever they needed me. Most of that time was spent guarding on the beaches of Ocean View. One of those summers I spent at an indoor Pool called Northside another summer I spent time at an outdoor pool called Berkley. But for years I was a lifeguard.

Lately I have realized that in one form or another I have remained a lifeguard. To this day I am still trying to save people, well more like help people either verbally or through actions, all with the best of intentions mind you. But I am just compelled to do it, I find it a struggle not to.

Let me give you an example relative to the previous company I worked for.

Way back (like chewie and yoda) I said to some people "if this project (name witheheld) doesn't happen and make some money you should start looking for another job." Some did some didn't

Then after the first round of layoffs in January, I asked people "What's your back-Up plan?" some had one, some developed them, some didn't

After the second round of layoff's in May, I tried to help some people formulate an exit strategy.

Then after the third round of layoff's in June, I tried to help people who I worked directly with and were laid off, find work. All the while asking those still there, "Do you have a back-Up plan? and I am not saying this won't turn around but if it doesn't what will you do?"

Now this is just one example, there are instances of me "trying to help people" that could be recounted at length for quite a long time, but the thing I am wrestling with at this time is, Why do I do this? Do the people I do this for/to/with appreciate this or even want this? Or do they just see this as meddling where one shouldn't meddle?

Could I stop doing this if I set my mind to it, or is it just part of my character, is it just part of who I am, I want to help people, I have to help people. Cause I just can't sit Idly by while they are in need.

Another example is, Friday I am racing from work to have Dinner with Kelly, at Kelly's (the restaurant) on the side of the road I see a mini-van with a flat tire. I wanted to pull over and help these people. There were 3 of them, they were older and in "nicer clothes" as older people are apt to wear. But I didn't cause I hadn't been good abotu getting home on time lately and I promised Kelly I would meet her for dinner, a dinner I was already later for. But I felt bad cause I didn't help them. Even though they were alrady in the process of changing the tire and had the jack under the car and the spare on the ground next to it.

Why did I feel compelled to help, they looked capable, they seemed to know what to do, they were well on their way to getting it done. Yet I still feel like I should have pulled over and asked if they needed help, after all that's the least I could have done.